Our school year is winding down and while we won’t stop completely over the summer, the kids’ workload will drastically decrease. I can’t believe we’ve made it through an entire school year! At this time last year, I was willing, but petrified to make the leap to homeschooling. The confidence I have in what we are doing ebbs and flows mainly because I am still somewhat stuck in “test as proof of progress” mode. I just ordered our end of year tests and my worst fear is that the kids will not do well. That would result in us being put on “homeschool probation”. The source of the fear is math. The kids’ lack of true mastery of mathematics was one of the main reasons we decided to homeschool, and so I’ve spent the past 6 months making sure they really understand the material we use. They’ve done well on chapter tests and cumulative reviews, but we are still playing catch up and probably will be for a while longer.
I always say I wish more homeschoolers would talk about these feelings. I can’t be the only one questioning if I’m doing enough and if it’s the right thing. In fact, I think questions serve a great purpose as a sort of self evaluation, if you will. I recently read a comment where someone said that homeschoolers are afraid to say anything negative about HSing b/c when you’re a part of a small community that is already seen as “other”, you don’t want to give critics more ammunition. I understand this, but it’s not helpful. I think in order to truly understand and be good at something, you have to consider and talk about all sides. And that’s what I aim to do.